I Have Spoken!!!

There are times we go through tough times. And there are times most of us fail to find a voice to table our side of the story to even those who are meant to be our closest confidantes. There are many who have found their voice late in life, some who are in the process now and some who are yet to discover the power of voicing their thoughts!! This for all those who are facing a dilemma- Good Luck!!

You came, you ruled

Swept me off into your world

Of words, simple thoughts

And silly jokes

I was silent..

You gave me purpose

Sense of direction

And a sense of self worth

I lapped it all up but yet

I was silent..

You spun your fables

You turned the tables

You then pulled the earth

from beneath my feet

I remained silent..

And then one day

I woke up and

I was done!

Done being silent!!

I thank you

 for the Joys you bought to my life

I thank you

 for the lessons You taught.

I thank you

for the deceit and the pain

But no longer

silent will I remain

There are times I wish I was vocal

Times I wish I could speak my mind

May be that is why you never really

could fathom,

My appreciation, adulation

and even my sarcasm!

Now that I have spoken

I feel good

A weight has lifted off my chest

I remain vocal I wanna be heard

I want no token, I won’t be broken

Know it for sure - I Have Spoken!!!

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The elixir of life!!

I may not be around for long

I am as good as gone

I have only pieces of life left

To gather from around

I haven't a way out now

I’m stuck in time

There is no way I can

rebuild the bygone

there is love and yet there isn’t

it is but a mirage!

the fading sight of you

echoes the rage in my heart

as the elixir of life ebbs

it brings about a calm

it is what I need now

I want and need the balm

I will walk the path of right

how empty it shall be

For I have nothing within me

No soul to accompany me

You are fast fading away

And I’m just a dream

The moments I had with you

Are like bubbles in the rain

I may not be around for long

I am as good as gone

I have only pieces of life left

To gather from around….

The impossible choice!

You see a lovely bird in flight

A sight that seems just right

Spanning its beautiful wings

Twirling in the playful winds

But can she be in the sky, forever

And not return to ground? Never!

Coz it is in this mud that she was born

Tis but here her seeds are sown

The earth has birthed her, nourished and fed her

Given her the trees to build her nest

Tis here that she has learnt to skip and hop

And scale the tree to the top!

Then one day she sees the sky

And decides to fly

Pushing her feet against the earth

She takes into the skies

She feels the wind beneath hers wings

And freedom in her veins

Soaring above the trees and earth

Thrilling madness reigns

Who does the bird belong to my friends?

Where do her loyalties lay?

Can she leave the earth and fly

Or leave the sky, on earth should she stay?

How can the earth hold on to her?

How can the sky not let go

Can the twain decide to share?

Her happiness and sorrow…

Story of a Woman-Part 2

Do I hear a faint voice from yonder?

Is it for me, is it for real - I wonder

Should I pay heed to this call?

Or do I just go on and bear it all

It is hard to believe there is help

It is hard to believe my pain is shared

Time has layered the heart so much

It is hard to believe, there is someone after all

It’s an ember, a tiny piece of light

hidden deep but shining bright

I must take the step and save it now

before it’s gone forever, lost in the folds of night

I have to fight stigma and despair

Take this fight to the end

To be stepped upon or step out sans au pair

It is a choice I must make and defend

The voice is now stronger

The rage is within

It will get me going

And give me wings

I am going to rise and leave behind me

Years of waste, guilt and self-pity

carry the scars I will, with pride

for they are the keepers of my ride

Of a time when I was lost and alone

Of a time when future was forgone

A time like the listless and wandering tart

not just me, it’s you too, cross your heart

I am not ashamed of my scars anymore

Look around, don’t we all carry a few?

Seek and you shall find many

Rising from ashes, glowing anew!

 Nothing comes easy, I know

Freedom not in the least

The ghouls will shriek, try and break my vow

But I shall slay the beast!!

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The Story of a Woman!!! Part1

This is dedicated to all Women out there!

Object to being abused, insulted, berated and defiled! Rise and roar for now is the time to shine!!

'Coz when you rise, you transform the world and when you roar the whole universe will listen!!

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 This is the story of my life, jaded

Soon it will feel gone, faded

Will anyone shed tears of love

Over my grave, when I have gone above.

Anyone,  anyone at all?

Born determined, rebellious and free

I fell for slavery, bonded labor to be

I have served now for a decade

I am tired I want some shade

Is there someone, anyone there?

I can call to and run to when scared

Anyone,  anyone at all?

I gave up freedom, gave up my spirit

For something I thought was lot like love

It turned out to be restricting, forbidding me, killing my voice

I’m trapped, let me out! Don’t you hear my silent noise

I shriek and I lament about it a lot

Is there anyone, can you hear me not?

Anyone,  anyone at all?

I have a progeny I can call mine

The joy of my world, my planets nine

It is he who needs me and I need him too

His smiles, lovely eyes and of his smell I reek

Are they the only treasures I seek?

Stop dreaming of being free

You are going nowhere, let it be

If you dare to spread your wings

In one swoop I will cut you down

You will lose everything you hold dear

Name, family, friends and near

Most of all you foolish one

You will lose your only son

I lay still, numb and quiet

Seething, simmering

In the deathly night

Is there a solution that I don’t see

Cant anyone tell me, enlighten me?

Anyone,  anyone at all?

One day will come, in a few years from now

My son shine will have to go anyhow

He will have to leave and walk away

To make his mark, to mark his day

Then I may find courage to get up and leave

But will it be late, too late to retrieve

Like a chain around my heart,

like an arrow piercing the dart

This thought weighs on me a lot     

It is my pain, my bane, my rot

Am I selfish to want to be me?

Is it terrible to just be?

Is my longing a serious crime?

Is there a soul out there like mine?

Can you call out and accept me

For what I am and who I am

Imperfect, flawed and yet so real

This is me, I am my seal

Anyone, anyone at all….

A love note to my beloved!!

I woke up this morning, found you lying by my side

           I wondered when you came in and snuggled inside,

I stretch, turn around and even though its time to go

           I decide to warm my “left out in the cold” toe.

I rest my head on your right shoulder

           feel the warmth of your skin against mine

and as I nestle into my niche, I find

           the urge to inhale you, breathe you, disintegrate into you.

The morning light sneaks in through the window dancing

warm, sunny, crisp and inviting

I feel you move, gathering me closer

as I look up I feel amazed by the calm on your face

I am content here, I have no fear

should the end come now, happily I shall bear

In your arms as I lay, all my worries are at bay

A blanket seems to be covering me up, keeping out the cold and pain

like a warm broth on an evening dampened by rain

Our love remains static, when every moment brings change

It’s the only haven to run back to, when all else fails

The few hours we have together, are enough for me to gather

armfuls of colorful gems – love, laughter & all that chatter

lying around the room in a scatter.

This! my love, is what is precious, this is what the heart yearns

spends a lifetime running after, and then the fool learns,

Cars, coins, courtesans everything else fails

the hearts is plain happy when love alone reigns.

All these lines running through my mind

Snuggling further, to myself I smile, it”s nine -lest i lose the rhyme 

I must put my pen to paper, not now though

in good time, all in good time!

Let me...

My dearest, let me take you with me

show you the warmth of my love

let me take you with me

for no reason at all.

walk with me, just enjoy the quiet

feel the raindrops and the sunlight

let your heart go, have some fun

let it enjoy a free run

hear me moan, hear me sigh

let me hear you reach a high

with my lips on yours, in a shop

feel your heart do a flip-flop

look around to see if anyone saw

and then widen your eyes at me, give me a paw!

call me – darling? just to have a look

when i’m hidden behind the aisle of books

and when you know i’m around

let your eyes crinkle and smile

let me stay back in the room 

surround myself in the cloud of your perfume 

let me take you for a ride,

on a highway by my side

let me feel the wind, hang my head out

feel your laughter rising inside

when you see my wind swept hair

let me fumble through words 

trying to explain my love for you

and then close the conversation

by telling me simply – I love you!

all these little joys i can bring to you

if you just let me….